Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Compassion in the Darkest Places


  [kuhm-pash-uhn]  Show IPA
a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a       strong desire to alleviate the suffering.

My first day back after a long break from writing I had a huge laundry list of things that have been compiled in my writing memory bank. New babies, politics, home disasters the list could go on. Yet a picture on a friends Facebook page really called out to me, and something I feel many people need to hear  today.

To find compassion is to find understanding.  This is something I have been embracing more and more as the years go, especially as a wife and Mother. When we were younger and still a struggle today, we formed judgements about others by how they look, act and mostly how they treat us. As I have a son and more so a fragile daughter, I can visualize now the little pig tailed girl running in from school crying about how mean or awful someone is being to her.  In which I now have rehearsed and will confidently say, some days easier than others.... "It's not about you".

I truly believe and know that behind every unkind action,word or judgement stems from hurt.  A hurt so deep that all of us couldn't comprehend.  Their anger is nothing more than a mask and strong desire to alleviate their pain at others expense. A journey they were given that they have yet to surrender to, that they have yet to give up control and that they have yet most importantly learned to find forgiveness for themselves. 

As a Mom I can tell you I could surely use some compassion some days, and thankfully my husband is full of understanding. With all the opinions, ideas, and mockery thrown at us on a  daily basis it's a wonder any of us stay sane.  I can't tell you the times during the day I beat myself up. The house is a mess, I look awful, my terrible two is not normal it's a result of me being a poor Mom, etc... The list goes on....I continue to beat myself down until the person I can throw it on for mere survival, comes through the door (i.e. my husband).  Luckily for me, he doesn't judge, he understands and there you find compassion.

Luke 23:24 always comes to mind when I find myself hurt by others judgements or actions towards me or my cruelty towards myself...."Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do."  Before you judge always  remember, the Lord has given each of us a journey. Amazing tests of our love for him. It can rock us to our core, make us unfamiliar with ourselves and others.  We hurt and we hurt others.  Ironically nothing more than  a plea to be understood and to have someone connect and understand with us.

Next time you feel led to judge-- stop yourself. Really look at the situation from all sides, and better yet get to know the person.Get to know their struggles, their past, their present.  There you learn to forgive, to understand and maybe truly get to know someone else or for that matter know yourself.

Children must be taught how to think, not what to think.” 
― Margaret Mead

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